I am but...warped and twisted

Hidden secret nobody knows
Can't tell anyone, thats how it goes
Harsh words and violent blows
"Raging rivers, gently never flow."
My eyes are open, my hands are fisted
Deep inside i'm warped and twisted
"Too many whens, too many whys
so many tricks, so many lies."
I'm not special, i'm not gifted
I'm just me, warped and twisted.
Sleeping awake choking on dreams
To many things that are not what they seem
Call my mind, the numbers unlisted
Deep inside, im warped and twisted.
On my knees alive but dead
I can't stop the voices in my head
Look at the blood my razor sheds
You'd think by now I would be dead
Am i too far gone? my mind was drifted
I'm just totally warped and twisted
Burnt out, washed up empty and hollow
Today is just yesterdays tomorrow
The sun goes down, the moon is lifted
and I'm still here warped and twisted.
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......tis was written in view of what happened a few months ago on self-reflection. Nay, i wasn't proud but i lost everything and the only "one" i so longed for. Till my pen bleeds its ink again.....